by Jarad Perry
Ah Chicago, the windy city, Chi-town, and any number of other names that can be conjured from the ether to opine about this beacon of democracy. A City Hall filled with the most pleasant and helpful of employees ready to address all your concerns. Streets filled with friendly faces, each greeting the new day with an enthusiasm that cannot be matched by any other group of citizens in the entire world.
Chicago is a shining example of dedicated public servants concerned with waste cutting and efficiency, of which another example cannot be found in the private sector, only going to show that government is better at maintaining a functioning hierarchy of management and employees. Oh, the naysayers like to spread their propaganda about how these hard working public servants allegedly skim money off the top in all types of so-called corrupt under the table dealings. To all those jealous of the immense greatness of the political culture of Chicago I would just like to say that sticks and stones may break our bones but your words may end you up in the river. Of course that is just a metaphor and the river I speak of is just the river of public opinion with the cement shoes of justice anchoring those propagandists to the truth.
The city of Chicago is filled with examples of properly running and waste cutting agencies. Why the Central Transit Authority is the perfect example of how to run a well oiled transportation department. With expenditures always coming under budget and trains running on time, the CTA enjoys a wonderful surplus. Yet, those hillbilly rednecks in southern Illinois (anything below I-80) continue to spread their lies about how they have to subsidize our so-called failing bureaucracies and ballooning deficits. Maybe they should stop trying to deny the citizenship of our greatest President and pick up a newspaper or a book and really learn something about honesty.
Honesty is the unofficial motto of Chicago and it only goes to show that the dedicated people who come up through the political apparatchik are the most trustworthy of politicians. The great history of Chicago politicians is long, but there are a few wonderful examples of those dedicated to the betterment of humanity. One great man was Mayor Richard Daley Sr., a towering figure in not only Chicago but Illinois and nay the entire United States. A man so dedicated to the people that he stands immortalized in the rotunda of the state capital in what is loosely called a city, Springfield.
His jolly frame is on full display for awe struck visitors to pay homage too when they grace the marbled halls of the capital building (Chicago really is the capital, but we like to keep up traditions). Richard Daley was a man of great integrity as once noted by Illinois State Senator William “Botchy” Connors about the young Daley, “you couldn’t give that guy a nickel, that’s how honest he is”. This level of honesty followed Mayor Daley all through his life.
He was mayor when those damn hippies disrupted the great Democratic convention of 1968, where he promptly showed them what’s what by ordering the police to disburse the disruptive anti-American crowd. He truly was a man of the people and should be held in our hearts forever.
Another great man to come from Chicago is the greatest President’s Chief of Staff the Honorable Rahm Emmanuel. Former Congressman Emmanuel is another great illustration of the quality of politicians that come out of Chicago. The man is so kind and generous that he once sent a fish, fresh as can be, to a pollster to show him that there were no hard feelings between them. That is just an act oozing with civility and hospitality, two traits that are ingrained in all the political leaders that emerge from the great city of Chicago.
Now it is time to get to the man that has already become the greatest President in the history of the United States as well as the greatest leader in the entire history of the world, Barack Hussein Obama. Although not a native of our fair city, he learned his political chops on our historic south side and, as such, gained the immeasurable skills that would carry him to the Presidency.
There is a great uniqueness about Chicago that one cannot quantify or measure in any meaningful way. The kindness of the people extends year round, but more importantly it is present on Election Day when the greatest of civic virtues is exercised. Voters from across the city, including stand-ins for the recently deceased, gather at polling places to cast their votes for the great leaders of our city, state, and country, so they may continue to lead the way to a prosperous future and a better tomorrow. Voting is such an important activity that we have a saying here “Vote early, Vote often” and we live by that motto to the letter.
So with all the greatness that Chicago has to offer in the political world how is it that the elitist Olympic committee excluded this beautiful city from the first round of the voting without blinking an eye; it seems absurd and an assault on reality itself. Chicago is the world. I think it might be time that the Olympic committee gets a Chicago style lesson. I wonder what type of fish they like. Yet, aside from this little set back, Chicago is a beacon of democracy.